I give up.

Ok. I made a big decision here. Remember the past posts how I keep talking about a book called Gilead by Marilynne Robinson? And remember how I keep saying how I couldn't finish it? Well I decided to give up and NOT finish it. That's right! I'm not going to finish this book (there is a great article by Nick Hornby he wrote for Believer and is now in a compilation book called Polysyllabic Spree who talks about letting go on this very topic)! Who cares you might ask...well I do. You see, I get very type A, neurotic even with books. If I start it, I HAVE to finish it, even if I don't pick it up for a year or so. I started this book with great expectations...I previously read Housekeeping, another book by her that Caitlin recommended which I fell in love with. But Gilead is boring. Really really boring. It is about an old man dying, a minister so there's a lot of J.C. references and a lot of repetition (just think about all the stories the old people in your family LOVE repeating). He is writing to his young son about life. I only got to page 80 something. Maybe that wasn't fair? My friend gives every book up to page 150 (she almost gave up on Blood Meridian but loved the ending). So should I give myself a page number as well?

"I don't write the way I speak. I'm afraid you would think I didn't know any better. I don't write the way I do for the pulpit, either, insofar as I can help it. That would be ridiculous, in the circumstances."

Maybe this book is too positive for me. It won the Pulitzer Prize in 2005 and P.P.s usually don't let me down. Here is a great review of the book. Let me know if you want my copy, I will mail it to you and maybe you can let me know how it goes.

What is love?

This is the cover of the book I finished last night. Up At The Villa by W. Somerset Maugham (the same author who wrote Of Human Bondage that I raved about). Gotta love the movie covers. And I can see why it would make a good movie (oh, you've never heard of the movie? And no I'm not going to watch the movie). The book reads like a soap opera. The protagonist is a beautiful woman is who is widowed (her marriage was rocky, but she married for love) and finds herself with other marriage proposals. One from a handsome-wealthy-tons-of-status man who has known her throughout her childhood (think Celine Dion) and another who just the opposite, but he still has the money (duh). Well, after a crazy night (not sure if I should tell you guys what happens in case you chose to read/watch), she is left in anguish but chooses to the truth over everything, bring the perfect women that she is. The moral of the story? You can have the most perfect man throwing himself at you, but if you don't love the dude, it doesn't really matter does it? And don't have sex with crazies.

WhyIwantedtocallthisblogDearCaitlinbeforeitwastaken

Still reading this folks?

To Caitlin in an email, subject line: cheesy quote
[“We write because we can’t not write. We want to make music out of our breath; we want to be under the power of an art that toys with us and could destroy us, but which allows us to get a glimpse of what’s real.” -Gary Young]

I took this quote from a Rumpus interview with the author. I send her stuff when it inspires me (well she actually writes). The line about music out of our breath, I effing loved it.

Her reply...
[yeah!

do i start every email with you with assent? yes! i do!

so i read the interview with gary young and got caught up for an hour reading about rimbaud and verlaine on wikipedia. rimbaud's mom was an overbearing troll! she made him smart but miserable, which plays perfectly into the dynamics of this family i'm writing about. thanks for the inspiration.

have you ever read 'someone like you' by roald dahl? i lean on his dark style of adult fiction a lot. i just put a great quote by him in my notebook:

"Parents and schoolteachers are the enemy. The adult is the enemy of the child because of the awful process of civilizing this thing that when it is born is an animal with no manners, no moral sense at all."

here's something you're welcome to get stuck in your head all day: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqV5KzbNYIQ]

I've already made notes to the authors she has listed. I don't know what I love more, actually reading books or talking about authors of future books to read...sounds quite sad but it's true.

On a side note, I recently finished Notes from Underground by Fyodor Dostoevsky. Not only was it a great read while being funny (he never lets me down) but discussion followed when I found out a few of my friends/coworkers read it too and really enjoyed it. The story is broken down into two parts: first part, more of ramblings in his head and the second part, explaining why with events that happened in his life. Don't expect to like the protagonist, he is a complete douche. Whats even better is that everyone can relate to him and though he created his own isolation in a way, he reminds us that we are all alone in this world (yeah, 'no man is an island' blah blah can go suck it). Next on the list, Chicken Soup for the Stone Hearted Soul by Juliet Han.

please feel free to advise me...

books I've started...
Gilead (Marilynne Robinson), Uncommon Grounds (Mark Pendergrast) & Notes from Underground (Dostoyevsky)

books I am borrowing...
The Reprieve (Satre), The Feminine Mystique (Quindlen), Rain of Gold (Victor Villasenor), & Quicksand and Passing (Nella Larsen)

books to reread...
Old Man & The Sea (Hemingway), Raise High the Roof Beam (Salinger), Tale of Two Cities (Dickens), Crime and Punishment (Dostoyevsky)

books on my mind...
The Lazarus Project (Hemon), House of Leaves(Danielewski), The Idiot (Dostoyevsky), Downtown Owl (Klosterman)

projects that if I had discipline/time/awesomeness would do this year...
read everything of Dostoyevsky
read all Pulitzer Prize authors
read all the books I own (seriously!)

awesome Sunday

And not because of Superbowl. My day off today, I declared that I would have nothing to do with work, volunteer work included. Sometimes you need to. Not to say I haven't been reading all the coffee blogs (I will spare you that topic).

My reading has been sporadic as things got crazy busy starting in 2010. I have been reading Gilread but haven't gotten around to finishing it (will write about that book later). But I can say picking up The Little Prince today was a great idea.

" 'What does "tame" mean?'
'It is something which is too often forgotten,' said the fox. 'It means to establish ties...'
' "To establish ties"?'
'That's right,' said the fox. 'To me, you are still just a little boy like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you have no need of me, either. To you, I am just a fox like a hundred thousand foxes. But if you tame me, we shall need one another. To me, you will be unique. And I shall be unique to you.'

I'm still waiting for Chicago to tame me.

And how could we forget this part...

" 'Now here is my secret. It is very simple. It is only with one's heart that one can see clearly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.' "